LivingIt’s taken me a long time to discover what pure living is all about.  Still haven’t actually been able to embrace what it should look like.  I’m talking about truly living.  Not from ego but from the heart.  Listening to what is truly going to fire me up instead of what is the easiest route.  I am always in constant battle with my mind.  My better side tells me to get up and go to the gym at 6AM.  I always feel better when I do.  Much better than when I don’t.  But subconsciously I make excuses and tell myself I’ll go later.  Ego talking.  I usually get busy doing everything else and then justify by saying I’ll do it tomorrow.

I have been talking about getting certified in yoga for many years.  Have been practicing for more than 40 years so you would think I would have found the time to do what it takes.  I finally have completed the course and it actually only took the time to do the work.  And what did my head tell me when I completed everything?  Wasn’t that difficult and why didn’t I do it sooner?

I wasn’t ready sooner.  I was ready now.  Maybe that’s what living is really all about.  It’s about getting to a point when all the excuses have been made and the heart just pushes ahead.  The heart doesn’t let you make excuses.  It just tells you it’s time and that’s that.  Living is knowing that in the end the heart really takes care of you.  I guess it’s the simple definition for intuition.  Heart equals intuition.

I have been learning to say no more recently.  I haven’t felt the need to work back to back on projects or be the “boss”.  Early in my career I thought that was living in my professional world.  Now I come to work more rested, focused and excited about what lies ahead. Don’t get me wrong.  Youth is wonderful in that you are willing to put your head down and do what it takes to succeed.  To take every opportunity to learn and move ahead.  That is what living seemed to be when I was younger.  And I loved every minute of it.  Wouldn’t change it because it has lead me to where I am now. I still love the challenge of being responsible for my projects but now I look at it in a different way.  I don’t need to do that twenty four hours a day, seven days a week.  I’m actually making the time to explore other venues.

But I find that guilt still tends to creep into my thoughts when the ego is talking.  And in my experience of what makes me happy or what makes me feel alive or what my idea of living is now…’s the simple things.  I have been fortunate to have traveled the world and seen how others live.  And that along with what lies ahead for me is all the living I need to do now to find my own happiness.

Studies show that when people are asked on their deathbed what they would have done differently they say they would have enjoyed life more and not worked so much.  I am determined not to have the same response when my time comes.  I want to say I experienced life in the true sense of living.