My mother, many years ago, told me that time goes much faster as you get older. I didn’t quite understand what she was getting at then but I do now. It’s been three weeks since my last post and I can’t believe the time has gone by so quickly. My computer was hacked and I lost everything from my blog. Which means I had to go back to square one and redesign the site. I am nowhere near a computer wiz so it was daunting for me when thinking about starting over.
I knew I had to wait until this project was over to really give my full attention to writing. It has been challenging some weeks to sit down, clear my mind and write. It has also been my salvation. In one sense, three weeks have flown by. And yet it feels like forever since I have written. Guilt has slipped in a number of times when another week rolls around and I have sat at my computer only to write emails and organize the next week’s work.
But now I sit in my office looking out at the olive trees and lavender and I am relieved that I am getting a break. From makeup that is…not from writing. I have missed taking my mind to someplace other than the day to day tasks of work. In writing down my thoughts it also makes me stop and realize that with each event there is a lesson. It may not be the lesson I want to learn at the moment but it is a valuable lesson none the less and I am grateful for those events. Yes, even the ticket. Funny how when something like a speeding ticket happens you notice even more how many people are driving unconscious. And I was and sometimes still am. Fatigue plays a large part in that and I have no one to blame but myself. Although now I catch myself more and alter my behavior. I let that person behind me go ahead and rush past. What I once was so unaware of has become more apparent. Funny how the cash and inconvenience can snap you into attention.
Which brings me back to getting hacked. That sounds so wrong in so many ways. And yet there are many terms when it comes to the computer and the internet that seem strange to me. Definitely a whole new language unto it’s own. That world seemed so vague to me until I found out how invasive it can be. I also notice how unconscious I was at being careful with passwords, websites and opening up any random email. What I once thought was so private is so easily compromised. And now, like the speeding ticket, I am altering my behavior. It was so easy being sucked into the vortex of the internet. But in that, I have also become aware of the time spent at the computer that I could use in my writing.
And that has brought me full circle. To how fast time can go and how we can miss so much in front of a machine that is suppose to give us more opportunities to find more time. Like trying to wrap your mind around infinity. Daunting. So I am now slowing down and enjoying the simple pleasure of finding the time to write and pause. Another lesson learned.